August 1, 2007

DISCIPLINE


I always knew discipline was a critically needed part of life, but I really didn't know what it meant. It seemed more closely aligned to getting in trouble than becoming successful. A review of the actual meaning from Websters 20th Century 2nd edition unabridged dictionary listed the definitions in order of how the word is used. The first word in the number one definition explains why it is so crucial: 1) Training that develops self control, character, or orderliness and efficiency. 2) the result of such training; self control and orderly conduct. 3) a system of rules or methods.
If you've read this blog for long you know where I think the system of rules or methods should come from. Proverbs 22:6 says "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it". Ephesians 6:4 says "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord". Jesus said in Luke 6:40 "A student is not above his teacher, but everyone who is fully trained will be like his teacher". 1st Timothy 4:8 says "for physical training is of value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come". Proverbs 3:12 and Hebrews 12:7 says the Lord disciplines those that he loves.

Continuing with the dictionary definitions, number 4) Subjection to rule; submissiveness to control. 5) Correction ; Chastisement; Punishment inflicted by way of correction and training. 6) anything taught; branch of knowledge or learning, and 7) to subject to discipline; to prepare by instruction; TO TRAIN. So you can see we came full circle with the meaning of discipline. Hebrews 12:11 says "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it". In other words, we're all going to go through it, so rejoice and learn from it, don't throw a pity party. It's for your own good.

I've often said most self-help books and all management books came from principles listed in Proverbs. That is to say there isn't really that much that's new since we're all human, even though each generation likes to believe they are somehow different. The Bible was written down thousands of years ago at a time in history far different than our modern era. The theme of my blog, as well as the book of Proverbs is wisdom. Take this caveat to heart: Solomon, who wrote the Proverbs also wrote Ecclesiastes 2:21 "For a man may do his work with wisdom, knowledge and skill, and then leave all he owns to someone who has not worked for it. This too is meaningless and a great misfortune". He then concludes that book in Chapter 12 with "Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every deed into judgement, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil".

That first definition mentioned training that develops self control, implying that we don't have it and it doesn't come naturally. Numbers 2,3, and 4 indicate that being submissive to control, order, or rules is how that self control is obtained. In a society that worships individuality, comfort, happiness, and personal pleasure it seems quite strange to say that those self centered priorities must be given up to achieve self control. That is not to say that one with self control can't be happy or comfortable. It is that system described earlier requiring prioritization of everything. The Bible records the 10 Commandments, that start with submission to and love of God, then follows with submission to and love of others, with specific commands for specific relationships. These also don't come naturally, but they're part of the system of rules in definition 3.


Training is the beginning of discipline, but motivation is what actually gets it started. Now that I've adequately described what discipline is, allow me to share a personal example of motivation. For years I went to the dentist and was told to floss but didn't. Despite many fillings, crowns and even a root canal, about eight years ago I read an article that said the body's immune system is taxed fighting inflammation such as gum disease. It's possible that the weakened immune system could be a cause of a cancerous outbreak that might otherwise be overcome by my immune system, according to the article. As my mother and sister died of cancer (and my brother since then), I found I was motivated to discipline myself to floss each day. The first day of 2000 I flossed as soon as I got out of bed, then continued to make that the first thing I did after a bladder break each morning. I have flossed my teeth every day since (never missed a day) by making it part of the daily morning routine. A 95% reduction in cavities and dental costs resulted, but more importantly to me there is no gum inflammation.

If the only aspect of life that discipline was needed happened in dental care, I'd be all set. Alas, there are many other required and desirable areas of life where this is crucial. I wrote in February 2006 about the need for balance in life. Physical, spiritual, mental, and perhaps other health areas of life make up a successful balance. Each requires a disciplined approach to be successful. I've spent the past 23 years involved in Toastmasters to offset stage fright. Americans, in general, are less disciplined than they were in previous generations. Many social ills come from the increasingly poor parenting habits of each generation as discipline is reduced in stature as a requirement of bringing up children. Writing the book "Dare to Discipline" launched the career of Dr. James Dobson. He has an updated version out that you might wish to read, especially if you are a parent.

Here is a key reason that lack of personal discipline among the population results in social ills. The same child who gets away with a tantrum or physical violence as a pre-schooler often takes the same approach as an adult because that was how they were trained to express their emotions in those situations. Those that have parents who discipline (#5 Correction ; Chastisement; Punishment inflicted by way of correction and training) their children show them they are able to overcome the feelings that come with a need for a tantrum. As an adult they are able to exercise self control (the same self control that comes from being disciplined) and control their conduct. Discipline to DO what is right and discipline to NOT DO what is wrong comes from the same source. Imagine an electorate who votes for a candidate who does not control their personal conduct as a candidate and then complains when they don't control their public conduct in office. Recent newspaper headlines may make that imagination easier.

This blog in August of 2006 covered the subject of goal setting, and this paragraph is related. If as a result of reading thus far you want to be more disciplined, start with the advise of Walt Disney. He said "The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing". Psychologists claim a habit is developed if you do anything 21 days in a row. If you need to change a habit it will take longer, but they key to this advise are the words "in a row". As an example, I recognize that I need to lose 15 pounds to be at my ideal weight. I understand that carrying around a 15 pound medicine ball 24/7 has the same effect on my body as the weight does, so I'm motivated to lose the excess pounds. I have or can read dietician advise to reduce caloric intake from a daily total. I "begin doing" tomorrow morning and continue for three complete weeks with no performance failures. I am now a disciplined eater and probably 1/3 or 1/2 way to my weight loss goal. After all, the excess weight came from a daily habit of eating too much, so it's logical the reverse will work.

There is a way the plan I just laid out can fail, and many people use it. I highly, highly, encourage you to avoid it or change even if you were previously trained to use it. The failure plan starts with your thoughts and is followed by your words. "I can't", or "It's too hard", or even "I'll just fail anyway so why even try" comes from training. We were programmed in such a way that an accumulation of words become truth to our psyche, so your first step to discipline is to replace those thoughts and words. "I can do it", "It's worth it", and "if God is with me who can be against me" are phrases that you can hear over and over and should. You may recall from the numerous previous mentions that the Bible has all the rules and methods needed for life. Philippians 4:8 says "Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things".

If you are in or wish to be in a leadership position, you must not only demonstrate discipline but also be able to attract followers who will be motivated to do the same. In the military, boot camps are established early in the time of service to teach and instill the chain of command. In business, politics, and a church the leader establishes a vision and then communicates that vision so that it is fully understood and embraced by capable focused trained followers. It is also why a key part of leadership is encouragement. The word disciple came from this aspect of disciplined leadership. The Bible says that Jesus simply said "come" to his disciples who dropped everything and followed him. He spent three years teaching them and then departed after a horrific crucifixion and arising from the dead. You don't have to rise from the dead to be a leader but you will need discipline.

The motivation needed to personally become disciplined is best defined as desire. If I want it enough to pay the price to get it, I'll learn, work, persevere, and develop myself until my desire is achieved. If I do not have that level of desire, then what I have is just a dream. It is possible to spark that desire by constant focus, prayer, and developing prioritization habits as part of a plan of success for the most important desires of all. Most people are not willing to pay the required price for things they say they want to do, or they want so many things there is no focus on any of them. In the USA today statistics say the average person is watching TV, playing video games or on Internet web pages for entertainment over 6 hours per day. While none of these things are necessarily bad, please understand that disciplined people utilize all 24 hours with their life's plan, not the minority of time left over after entertainment and a healthy number of hours of sleep.

Art Williams, author of "Pushing Up People" who also wrote an interesting book titled "All you can do is all you can do" said the reason most people are not successful in life is that most people do ALMOST enough to win, then they get discouraged. Nobody can motivate you but yourself. Art's 4 principles for success: 1) Desire gains strength when it has a concrete form 2) Desire become an obsession 3) Desire becomes a commitment 4) Desire becomes endurance. I mention him at the end as an example of a financially successful Christian businessman (except during the time he owned the Tampa Bay Lightning hockey team) because of the balanced life he achieved for his family and friends with his millions. The forward of his book had endorsements from Dr. Norman Vincent Peale, Pat Boone, Zig Ziglar, astronaut Alan Shepard, Dr. Bill Bright from Campus Crusade for Christ, Truett Cathy from Chick-fil-A, and Rocky Graziano, former middleweight champion of the world. His wife inspired a nonprofit organization named the A.L. Williams Family and Marriage Resources. He still writes a free blog at www.everybodywantsacoach.com. 40 years ago he was a high school football coach making $10,700 per year. What will be written about you 40 years from now? 30 years from now? 20 years from now? 10 years from now? 5 years from now? 1 year from now? Mentally focus on what you truly desire right now and never give up!!!